When your single and lonely your mind can quickly turn back and think about your past relationship. Then you may believe you were happy and things were not as bad as first thought and you may even be tempted to go back., but is there really any future in the past?
One of the main reasons for this is because you know the person and you know what to expect of them, and at one time everything was full of romance and good times.Although you were not always happy it is easier to remember the good times when you are lonely and you forget about the pain.
The make up sex is great, but there is far more to a relationship than just sex. You can’t go back just because you want something that is comfortable. If this is the reason reconsider because it will not work.
It is so easy to get it into your head that someone is better than no one, even when the ex was not your ideal partner. You have to remind yourself of all the reasons why you broke up, no matter how much you miss them.
Rather than feeling sorry for yourself or wallowing in self-pity go out there and make new friends, do something that motivates you. When you’re keeping yourself busy your pity will soon turn to confidence and this in turn will make you attractive. The best way to do this is to make sure you keep your time busy to prevent you looking backwards.
Your overlooking the reasons for the break up
There were reasons why you broke up in the first place and you need to remember this. The reasons for breaking up do not have to be about blame, sometimes people just outgrow one another, and that’s not anyones fault.
If you’re the one that left as it was not working for you remember why you left and remind yourself of your new goals. If your parter was the one that left, keep reminding yourself that you’re worth more than an afterthought.
Yes, you would be surprised how many people go back to an ex for this very reason. Many couples go through the ‘I don’t want you, but I dont want anyone else to have your either’ stage before they can move on. The very thought of them being with someone else is appalling and painful, yet you were unhappy together. If it’s a trial separation and one is sleeping with someone else ask yourself how you really feel and be honest about it.
Remind yourself you broke up for a reason. Try to have some maturity about the situation and move on because going back to a relationship full of jealousy will not work. Adding jealousy to the reasons you broke up in the first place will make the whole situation nasty.
Put Your Happiness First
In all relationships it comes down to happiness and your own fulfillment is the biggest reason why you don’t want your ex back. You may think that a reconciliation will bring joy and the love it once did, but it won-t, the truth is that not moving on will do that.
Happiness and fulfilment come from within and once you have mastered this then no one will ever be able to steal your happiness. Authentic happiness does not depend on someone else, it depends on you. Being happy within yourself will attract like-minded people. Running back to a relationship that has done its course will not make you happy, only you can. Once you have found your inner happiness and know what you want and deserve get out there and shout from the rooftop ‘I’m Single’ and find your ideal partner.